I’ve been inspired by my mother’s sapphire ring to reflect about three generations of women in my maternal line. This blue stone has strong symbolism, and there are several characteristics that have been associated with it since medieval times. These include power, strength, kindness, wise judgement, protection, good fortune and spiritual insight. I’ve presented my maternal great-grandmother and grandmother previously in this series; today I’m thinking about my mother and what sapphire qualities she possessed.
Mary-Jane Granger Eckhardt (1929-1998)
My mother was one powerful, strong woman. She was never afraid to “tangle” (her word) with anyone, be it the notorious neighbour my sister and I called Motorcycle Lady, or the doctor treating me for chronic pneumonia (she insisted I be tested for cystic fibrosis), or the local tavern that thought a sign saying “Gentlemen Only” could keep her out.
Mary-Jane taught me that I could do anything I put my mind to – and this I believed because, well, my mother said so! In our house there was no concept of limitations for girls, probably because Mary-Jane was the one who fixed the broken toasters, claiming my father didn’t know which end of a hammer to use (something he happily agreed with.) Also, she was better at math than she was at English, or sewing, or gardening. In another era, I know she’d have made a crackerjack software designer.
She responded to people with kindness first and she did this even when others did not:
- When an Indian family moved into our townhouse development and all the other neighbours stayed away, making whispered remarks about curry odours, Mary-Jane went over to introduce herself and struck up a long-lasting friendship with the beautiful young mother, learning about the lady’s culture and delighting in her wardrobe of exquisite saris.
- When my cousin Brian’s third wife, Karen, first came to his mother’s house to meet the family, nobody said very much to her. Karen told me after mom died that she felt awkward and unwelcome until my mother crossed the room to shake hands, saying, “Hi. I’m Aunt Mary-Jane.”
Mary-Jane loved babies and children. One of the best pieces of advice she ever gave me (and she gave me plenty of good advice) was when I had my own children. She said: “just love them.” This I have found to be a fine piece of wise judgement. What if this were every parent’s guiding mantra?
Like the fascinating sapphire stone itself, my three maternal ancestors – Josephine, Mary, and Mary-Jane – were multi-faceted. There was much more to their personalities than the particular sapphire characteristics I’ve described. But I’ve enjoyed viewing them through this “blue lens.”
May I learn from them to exhibit strength, wise judgement and especially kindness.
Something to ponder: Do you have any Sapphire Women in your life?
Love your beautiful testament to your great grandmother, grandmother and your mother. YOU HAVE THE POWER. It’s in your DNA.
PS Great hairdo and photo.
Thanks, M2! And we know it’s all about the hairdo…
Hey LeeAnn I so remember your Mom and Dad. How strong she was. Thank you for your stories. They are wonderful!
She sounds like such a lovely woman. Kindness is one of my top-three life values and I hope to always instill that idea in my own children. Such an inspiring story of an inspiring woman!
I knew you had that kind of mother because you are just like her…..beautiful, strong, intelligent, talented and a loving Mother too!
Sorry I cannot say the same. My mother could only relate to men with her flashing and beautiful eyes. She had 4 boys in a row and had my brothers around her little finger and she had fun with them. 7 years later I was a mistake and appeared. My father was delighted and loved me so much and taught me everything to ensure I would do well in life. Unfortunated he died of cancer when I was 16 yrs old andvin grade 12. I was totally devastated. It did not take long for my Mother to dump me and because of my father’s teaching at 16 & 1/6 half I made it in this world and Dad with with me all the way. My mother batted her eyes at men to get her way in life…..I used my brain and my love to learn and be my best and my love for the friendship of girlfriends who made me laugh and enjoyvtheir friendship.
Thank you for the nice stories of the wonderful females in your life!